Beowulf in the City

            Barry Wolfe reached over and smacked his alarm clock, ready to start another fantastic day at work. He walked over to his closet, donning his bright blue vest and khaki pants. He grabbed his name tag and a piece of toast on his way out as he began the trip to his favorite place in the world. He hopped in his jalopy and forged ahead to his business-place. He pulled into his reserved spot for employee of the month in the parking lot and walked towards the automatic doors. He looked up and smiled as he gazed upon the blue and white logo that meant the world to him. Walmart.

            Barry walked into the entrance hall and was inspected by the security guard sitting at his post. “I’m sorry Barry” the guard began “but I need to mark your items before you go in.” Barry pulled out his cell phone and the guard marked it with his seal of approval. The guard handed back his phone and said “Ok Barry, sorry for the holdup. You are allowed in now.”

            Barry marched into the store with a spring in his step as all his friends and co-workers greeted him. He soon went into the manager’s office to receive his daily duties. As he opened the door, he saw Mr. Roth pacing back and forth around the room. Barry was the first to break the ice by asking “What’s the matter Mr. Roth? Something seems to be troubling you.” Mr. Roth turned towards Barry with a worried look in his eyes.

            “Oh Barry, it’s terrible!” said Mr. Roth, “I have reason to believe we have a vandal in the store.” Barry immediately pulled up a chair, interested to hear more about this. “His name is Glenn Dale. I’ve heard he’s been rearranging items on the shelves and knocking over displays. All just for fun! It’s outrageous and I need you to put a stop to it as soon as possible!”

            Barry leaped out of his chair and looked his boss in the eyes. “Don’t you worry Mr. Roth,” Barry said “I’ll catch this Glenn and see that he is put in his place!” Barry stormed out of the room and started scouring the store for anything that looked out of the ordinary. He noticed several items had been knocked off their shelves so he put them back up and continued searching. He followed the trail of misplaced items and broken advertisements until he came across a young man throwing several products around the isle. Barry reached to his belt and whispered something into his walkie-talkie before confronting the suspected vandal.

            Barry approached Glenn and tapped his shoulder. Glenn turned around and stared down at the honorable employee. He was much bigger than Barry but he stood his ground and began to talk to the brute. “Excuse me sir,” Barry began “but you must stop what you are doing right now or I will be forced to take action!” Glenn said something to Barry but he slurred his words so much that he didn’t understand any of it. Barry assumed he was drunk and decided to try and grab the man’s arm to escort him out of the store.

            This turned out to be a bad idea because as soon as Barry grabbed ahold of him, Glenn spun around slamming him into the shelves. Barry collapsed to the ground with this monster of a man looming over him. He stood back up ready to continue the fight but he was almost immediately thrown down again. Barry looked back up and saw Glenn coming down on him once again. Suddenly, he froze in place and started twitching like a madman before collapsing right next to Barry. Barry noticed the two prongs stuck in Glenn’s back, meaning he had been tazed. The security guards Barry called earlier had finally arrived and dragged the unconscious drunkard out of the store.

            Mr. Roth walked into the isle and helped Barry to his feet. “Barry, are you alright?” Barry nodded his head, to hurt to speak. Mr. Roth spoke for him “Barry, I can’t thank you enough for getting rid of that hooligan for us. As a reward I am promoting you to assistant manager!”